I have a random question for you. What’s your thought on experiencing roadblocks? Annoying right!? I mean, think about it, there you are just going along in life, and you’re just cruising along and then all a sudden, you look up ahead, and you see something is blocking your path. Now when you can see it coming, they aren’t as annoying. You have time to prepare yourself for whatever you need to do when it comes to dealing with it. But in life, we usually don’t see roadblocks coming; we don’t have the time to prepare. We have to figure out what to do when we find that we are stuck in one place when we are attempting to move forward. And that can be very frustrating, especially when you thought you were on a path that was in union with God’s plan for you.
"When we do realize that we need time to breathe and focus on ourselves, this rest does not make us weak..."
I find that some roadblocks are small enough that we can adjust our strategy and move on by them. Usually, it only takes a little while to get past. In other cases, we see so many roadblocks on our path, and we keep trying to “just push through them.” We think that’s precisely what we need to do because we are strong and we can do it. God makes us strong, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t need time to rest up between daily difficulties. And more importantly, when we do realize that we need time to breathe and focus on ourselves, this rest does not make us weak.
I occasionally notice individuals taking the time to care for themselves during or after these daily trials and tribulations, which we are blessed with. I find these people to be very strong because it is not easy to take time for yourself. It doesn’t mean that you are selfish just because you need time to rest. Everyone needs time to rest, recuperate, and keep their mental health in a good state.
Mental health nowadays is something that we all need to take into consideration. There are so many things that go on in our lives where we feel we are out of control. It is easy for me when these situations arise to say, “it’s OK I’ll be all right.” All the while, I know that my mental health may not be in great shape, but I go to work serving and helping others while neglecting myself. I often forget about myself and the need to build myself back up. And I have noticed that this has actually taken a significant toll on my mental health.
"It seemed like a message from God that I needed to rest and that I needed to take time for myself to allow myself to process everything that has been happening..."
I have seen forms of depression in my daily habits over the past summer and fall semester. I have come to understand my many roadblocks that have popped up as I tried to push through and hide the fact that I was hurting. It seemed like a message from God that I needed to rest and that I needed to take time for myself to allow myself to process everything that has been happening. I was honestly scared to tell my family that I needed to take a break from school for a little while.
I was afraid that they were going to say, “you have one semester left why don’t you just push through it and finish so that way you don’t have to deal with school anymore.” I knew if I did that, then I would wholeheartedly go cold inside. If I did this, I knew I would never be the same. I was afraid that if I push myself through this last semester, while not taking the time, which I needed to rest and recuperate...I knew that I would regret it. I may take this frustration and redirect it towards my field of study. I may end up hating what I was going to school to do for the rest of my life. I know that is something God would not want for me.
When I did tell my family, they were all very supportive! I was so happy. When I communicated this to my friends, they told me they were so proud that I was able to see that I needed to take a break from school because they also wanted the best for me. God has put so many beautiful people in my life. I count all my close friends past and present as true blessings. Even though situations within my family may be hostile, I still feel supported when it comes to making my own decisions, and that is something that I hold very close to my heart. After I have finalized my decision to take a break from school during the spring semester, I have felt an immense feeling of overwhelming peace. When I think about the future, I am no longer frustrated or scared.
"I now know that it was God telling me something that I was hearing but didn’t entirely listen too. And I now see that God was basically (kindly) yelling at me.."
God has put many signs, signals, and direction in my life; they have always come in different forms. Usually, these were “ah ha” moments. This did not happen immediately. I was not reading the signs that he was giving me about taking a break. I didn’t quite get it until my financial aid was causing me so much frustration that I just stepped back and looked at what was going on and said: “OK, God, I get it.” I still believe that I am walking the path that is right for me and following God’s plan even though I have seen a huge roadblock in my way. I now know that it was God telling me something that I was hearing but didn’t entirely listen too. And I now see that God was basically (kindly) yelling at me, “YOU NEED TO REST!” I can laugh at myself now because it took so long for me to hear what God had been saying to me.
When looking at the roadblocks that have come up in my life over the past summer and fall seasons, I have noticed they’ve been getting more intense. And I was beginning to have a harder time handling them. I was becoming ill-motivated and becoming very tired all the time I would eat less and sleep more. It took so much for me to get out of bed. I knew I had to get out of bed for class, and that was easy. Still, when it came to seeing the people that I cared very much about like my friends and my family and most importantly God, it became even harder for me to get up, get dressed, and go do something.
"The roadblocks were placed in my way as a sign that I needed to take a break and truly sit down and breathe and take some time to determine and discern, with God's guidance, the best course of action for my life..."
I would continue to pray and continue to talk to God and would go to church every Sunday. I would pray, but it would be tough for me to pray for myself. I would pray mostly for those around me. Very rarely did I pray for myself as I didn’t want to seem selfish. I was trying to convince myself that I was “OK,” and everything was fine. Still, as I kept seeing all of these different roadblocks come up in my path as I tried to go along, I realized that the roadblocks were not put in my way as a test or a sense of annoyance. The roadblocks were placed in my way as a sign that I needed to take a break and truly sit down and breathe and take some time to determine and discern, with God's guidance, the best course of action for my life. It took so long for me to comprehend that I needed to truly sit down and allow myself time to heal. I needed time to pray and process the things that have been happening around me and in my family.
Now that I have finally read the signs, I can actually see that praying for myself by spending time in prayerful reflection is very "self-conscious" and is not “self-ish.” I now understand that just because there are roadblocks in my life, that doesn’t mean that I am on the wrong path. It doesn’t mean my time treading this path was wasted if it is to diverge or change routes or directions. It doesn’t mean that roadblocks are only there to test me or annoy me but that God permits them to bring us closer to him and that I need to keep working and breathing. It is often necessary and wise to take care of yourself via prayerful rest, so that you can continue to do God’s will for his people in your fullest capacity.
I want to make the following recommendation. If you find that you are not moving forward on your “presumed” path because there is something in your way. Take the time to learn everything you can about what is in your way. It is crucial to remember in moments like these that God is with each of us. We must seek him in restful prayer to help us move these obstacles in our path so that we can continue to run to him and live out his plan for us.
With all God's love and mine,