When I look outside when it rains, I try to find a colorful rainbow. A rainbow is bright, beautiful, and you always think there is something better at the end of that rainbow, possibly even treasure beyond imagining.

I have been thinking a lot lately about diversity in the world. I haven’t seen it much, especially since March. My heart is heavy knowing we are not kind to one another. Matthew 22:39 states, “you shall love your neighbor as yourself"  (NRSVCE).  I don’t see love, all I have seen is hatred amongst our brothers and sisters. Why? Aren’t we all one body in Christ?   

I was born and raised in Kentucky. A lot of people’s first thought is Kentucky is so backward, especially with their views. But what I remember from living in Kentucky is all the diversity. It was a melting pot of the world, and that is how I look back at my hometown of Elizabethtown. Elizabethtown is next to the Fort Knox military base. I remember seeing people of all shapes, sizes, colors, and religions. This town and the people around me that I encountered while growing up shaped me to be the person, the human being I am. It didn’t matter to my friends (or to me, for that matter) what race they were, their family’s political affiliation, religion, or whether they were cheerleaders, football players, or baseball players. Those were just titles. My mother raised me to see the good in others’ hearts, and not to disregard the differences, but to recognize the differences between us strengthen the whole body of Christ. Titles and other characteristics do not define who we are.

What is more important?   That you are in a particular political party or that you are a kind and loving person? As Galatians 3:28 states, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free person, there is not male or female; for you are all one in Jesus Christ" (NRSVCE). When I encounter someone, I do not see classifications; I only see Christ in that person.  This begs the question: Who do we say that we are?

 I am Amy - a government employee, a part of a political party,  a white woman.  But, these titles and characteristics are not who we are.  We are children of God, and we all need to be able to look past individual characteristics or group associations and look at their hearts. 

I recently saw that a journalist told another journalist he had decided to remove people that didn’t go along with his political views from his life. I thought, why? What does politics have to do with who that person really is? I have people in my life with views that are very different from mine, including politics, religion, and other beliefs. I am not going to push anyone away just because their opinions are different from mine. I wouldn’t be the person I am today if it weren’t for all my friends and family’s various backgrounds, religious beliefs, and cultures. I have a multicultural blend of friends from countries such as Ecuador to India, to Japan. My friends and family come from different religious backgrounds as well, from Buddhists to atheists. I have learned so much from all of them. I just wouldn’t be Amy without them.   Apart from learning from them, God placed them in my life to serve them, and by serving them, I serve Christ.

​​As the very beloved Fr. Savio said to me recently, when you feel the weight of anxieties, all you have to do is reach out to God. When you feel anxious, the devil is trying to weigh you down. You can overcome him by taking that small step and reaching out to God. As Fr. Savio exhibits so well, there is always a positive outlook to our troubles…God is always with you. 
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​So, how? How do we reach out to God? I would like to give you a few ways that the saints and fathers of our church recommend and ones that I find helpful for me when I am feeling the weight of the world:  
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​Pray –
​The beauty of prayer is that it can be done anytime, anywhere. If you don’t know what to say, that’s okay! You can talk to God like you are talking to a friend. He will always have time to listen to you. A simple prayer, found in Matthew 6:9,  "Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread.  And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.   And do not bring us to the time of trial, but rescue us from the evil one."   Also, don’t forget your rosary, as it can be helpful for many scripted prayers.   (Mathew 6:9-13, NRSVCE)​ ​

Read the Bible –
We have so many lessons to learn. Even as we get older, our perspectives change, and we view stories differently and ask different questions. I challenge you to look up one of your favorite childhood Bible stories. I bet you think about something differently or ask a question you may not have asked before. By spending time in the Word, we can learn something new, which may help us overcome or, at the very least, bring peace to our current situation. One of my favorites out of Matthew, Mark, or Luke is when Jesus ventures out with the disciples on a lake, when a raging storm overcomes them, and Jesus is fast asleep. The disciples woke him in fear of their lives. Then Jesus replied to them, “Where is your faith?” When Jesus calmed the raging winds and rocky water, the disciples were in amazement.  What would you have thought if you were on the boat? Would you have feared the weather or held faith in the Lord? What would have been your reaction to Jesus walking on water!? (Mark 4:35-41, NRSVCE)

Write/Journal –
I have been told that often people carry around cumbersome burdens as they simply feel like they have no one to talk to. Talk to God.  I would also encourage you to reach out to your local parish for spiritual direction or confession. In the meantime, write all your thoughts and feelings down. It can help you process the emotions you are feeling. Often, just writing it down can help you feel some relief. 

Listen to Songs/Sing –
As many before me have said, music can draw us out of difficult emotions…and the beauty of music can bring us closer to God. We are not alone in our feelings. Music can help in expressing what we feel. There are so many songs in which you may feel a connection, and often the genres do not distinctly matter.  Whether you are cruising down the road with the radio blaring or finding a quiet place to sit and reflect with soft background music, it can help you relax and clear your mind. A recommendation of mine is Lauren Daigle’s Turn Your Eyes. An old song with a new twist. The song goes a little like this, “Oh soul, are you weary and troubled? No light in the darkness you see?, There’s light for a look at the Savior, And life more abundant and free.” 

​I hope that these recommended opportunities to reach out and connect with God help you find comfort. The last thing I want to leave as an encouragement. The Lord replies to the disciples in John 16:33, “I have said this to you, so that in me you may have peace. In the world you face persecution. But take courage; I have conquered the world! (NRSVCE)” We can turn our grief in to joy, turn that negative into positive, turn the closed door into an open one. 

May we always find peace in knowing that Christ the King is in control.

​Many Blessings!

​Steph

Integrity, kindness, humility, and grace are qualities I strive for in my little life. At times, it seems impossible to exhibit such virtues in the face of pride, hatred, and incivility, and, yet as followers of Christ, we are called to do exactly that - the impossible. 

Emotions have been running high for a nation torn apart by civil unrest, injustice, a virus that has killed hundreds of thousands of people, and a presidential race that affects the world, not just our fifty states. Our common home is most certainly and continuously under attack from our greatest enemy, Satan. Lately, it feels unrelenting as a fire of animosity is lit and stoked by politicians, news anchors, neighbors, coworkers, friends, and family, most egregiously pitting Christian against Christian. A divisive, disoriented, and disconnected Body of Christ cannot function fully, which is precisely what our enemy, the devil, wants. It is sometimes hard for me to wrap my brain around Christians having such different political views. Still, I then remember that God is a lover of variety and our opinions, personalities, and passions provide a balance in the Body of Christ, albeit sometimes a frustrating balance.

What do we do when we feel that deep pang of injustice and our zeal for goodness turns sour in our words and hearts? My initial response to this question was not Christ-like. I wish I had the grace, patience, wisdom, and love of St. Paul or St. Teresa of Calcutta.  But instead, my blood boiled, and I wanted to reject the world that can be so thoughtless and cruel. The sin that has marred the world since Adam and Eve blooms in mind as I focus on the world’s brokenness and mourn a world that will never come to pass. Even in my yearning for peace, my thoughts are corrupted, and instead of treating others with grace, I become angry.  
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Only in heaven will righteousness truly reign. Injustice will always rule on earth because of the sin that entered the world. That is not to say that we should give up the fight for justice. Just the opposite, we are called to serve and be the hands and feet of Jesus on earth. I often struggle with the following:  finding hope and trusting that our sovereign Lord is in control and resigning myself to rely upon and trust in his care of all things. 

I repeatedly have to remind myself that ultimately all evil will end.   Christ has already won. I have to remember that I cannot wage war against unfairness and oppression on my own, as I also pray for the grace to exude kindness and patience to those who would be against me. 

While waiting for the Second Coming of Christ, Christians are called in for damage control and to demonstrate the love of God through our works and words. As Christians are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus on earth, we are also called to find and hone our own unique skills, which can be used to win others to Christ and show the goodness of our God. 

I come from a strong Catholic family of 7.   Growing up, my sisters and I were always told of the importance of the vocation of marriage. I remember my mother reading from The New Saint Joseph Baltimore Catechism about vocations, specifically holy matrimony. In that book, it talks about the chief duties of a husband and a wife. The primary responsibilities of being faithful to each other and providing in every way for the children God may give them. As a child, hearing this sounded very appealing. I think most children, at some point, think about marriage or at least parenthood.

​As I got older, my desire for marriage faded and was replaced by a powerful urge to join a religious order. To me, there was no greater form of happiness than to dedicate my entire life to God. In 2016, I had the honor of attending World Youth Day in Krakow, Poland. One of our stops before attending the event was Rome, Italy. Our diocese was blessed enough to be able to celebrate mass in Saint Peter’s Basilica. We were urged to pray about our vocation and holdfast to our callings/awakenings from the trip’s outset.    I went on the trip, thinking that my desire to join a religious order would be solidified, but the exact opposite happened. During the celebration of mass at the basilica, I had an awakening. It felt as though someone was speaking to me directly, and a feeling of warmth and intense light came from the altar as the consecration took place. The voice repeatedly said, “You are called to enter into the married life, stay chaste.” This went on until I received Communion.

For my entire adult life, I have been superficially...unlucky. Small things, like getting stopped by trains on my way to class or having to come into work early only for the shift to be canceled right as I arrive. Never anything significant, and certainly not enough for me to ever complain. If I am honest, I've got a blessed life. I have a great relationship with my siblings and parents. I have a wonderful, loving, supportive girlfriend who cares deeply about both myself and my family. I attend a great, albeit difficult school and am receiving a robust education, which has helped form me into the man I am now. I love what I do, and my future seems to be bright.  With all of this in mind, you may think my life is all figured out.  It is not.  Only our God knows the uniqueness of the journey that is set before each of us.   I needed to learn how to let God take the lead. 

Unluckily, I had a group of friends as a freshman who shared the same sentiment, who disliked the church and had no faith. They nudged me closer and closer to a life of complete rejection of the church. I started dating, which I hadn't until college and tried things I told myself I never would. How rocksteady were those morals when confronted with momentary pleasure? They could never hold up. I was spending all of my energy chasing fleeting happiness and brief experiences of immediately evaporating pleasure.   I craved the next buzz, completely content to live my life consumed by sin. I didn't care about anybody. What was the result?   My relationships started to crumble. I spent so much time utterly ignoring my conscience, spending zero time in prayer or active discernment, and missing God's purpose for my life.    I lost sight of what makes romantic relationships loving, viewing them almost machiavellian, merely a means to an end. The relationship became more and more abusive, and I didn't want to realize that I was the one being abused.  I thought I was okay with being used for sexual purposes, as long as I felt that moment of happiness that made it all worth it.   I started becoming upset with it but would always just be shut down for it by her.  She was often telling me if I kept looking for love and a purpose, she would leave me.  She was always disappointed. I was never good enough. Eventually, I was even losing what I thought I needed in the relationship.   She would tell me repeatedly that I wasn't good enough sexually, I never lasted long enough, and that I didn't satisfy her.  
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